A double dose of Mrs. Mills' wisdom

It was difficult to choose which of Mrs. Mills responses was the most outstanding this week. Was it the young woman, who was about to discover that the only bird her prospective date was interested in watching was the type with shaved legs, or was it the odiferous man suffering from an underwear shortage?

You decide.

I’m 20 years old and have been asked out by an attractive man 20 years my senior. He wants to take me bird-watching on our first date. I’ve never been in this type of social situation before and am desperately unsure of what to wear, how to behave and so on. Please help me, as I want to make a good impression.

Oh, poor Amy. Mrs. Mills spells it out for her.

Heels, short skirt, sheer blouse and a cashmere cardie. Anything else (especially involving stout boots and an anorak) is asking for trouble, as he’ll think you are actually interested in sitting at the side of some damp patch of countryside for hours and hours, staring at brown things fluttering about in the distance. I would hope that by bird-watching he really means a little alfresco frolic in a discreet hide, otherwise you might have picked a real tit-fancier.

And then there's this...

I am getting much grief from my wife about not changing my underpants on a daily basis. How can I persuade her that this hopelessly idealistic attitude of hers is purely a “woman’s thing”? Do you think I could get away with it if I change to those baggy boxers?

Mrs. Mills actually loses it a little.

Sometimes I read a letter, flop back in my chair, sigh deeply and shake my head. This one has been sitting in my in-tray for a while, so presumably you are no longer married and it’s liberty hall for you in the underwear department. I hope you enjoy your bachelor status. It’s going to last a long time.

Read the rest at The Times.