Sing a song of sixpence...

The US General Accountability Office (GAO) did an audit of the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) to see how they did when it came to handing out money to the victims of hurricane Katrina.

Oops!

MORE than $1 billion in aid to the victims of Hurricane Katrina was wasted on fraudulent or improper payments for a dizzying array of items, from divorce lawyers' fees to an all-inclusive Caribbean holiday.

Sometimes, after a hurricane, you just need to get a divorce. And if you're going to take a holiday, make sure it's all inclusive.

More than 1,000 prisoners were among those who claimed rental assistance for destroyed or damaged homes, from places as far away as Texas and Georgia. More than $5 million was paid to people who registered a post office number as their destroyed property.

Hey! If they can't vote...

In one case a man stayed for nine weeks at government expense at a resort in Hawaii that cost more than $100 a night, while claiming rental assistance of $2,358 for a destroyed property that he did not even live in.

But was the resort all-inclusive?

Another man received the same amount after listing his destroyed home as Greenwood Cemetery in New Orleans.

Perhaps he was just thinking of the future.

Been hit by a category 5 cyclone lately? You need to kick back and relax a bit. Y'know, just enjoy life a little to help you relieve the stress and get you back on your feet.

Investigators found that $2,000 pre-paid debit cards issued to alleged victims were spent on items such as champagne at $200 bottle of Dom Perignon, pornographic videos, sex toys and sports events.

OK. Well, maybe not that much.

Of course there is the little point that the US would like Canada to pay that bill.