The Muldoon and the Oliphant

"The time has come," the Oliphant said,
"To talk of many things:
Of envelopes stuffed with wads of cash
And if they came with strings--
Perhaps you only beat the rap
Because the pigs were schwings*."

"But wait a bit," the Muldoon cried,
"Before we have our chat;
I have complaints to make," he said,
"Regarding Steve the Fat."
"No Hurry," said the Oliphant,
"There's always time for that...

But was that 'pasta' money used
To give Joe Clark the axe?
Is turning noodles into LAVs
A job for party hacks?
Did you stash that $300,000
To avoid a fulsome tax?"

"O weep for me," the Muldoon said:
"For all of it is lies."
With sobs and tears he socked away
His 2 million dollar prize,
And held his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.

* "After years of investigating Mulroney, the RCMP never found out about his job with Schreiber or the now infamous cash payments. However, the Mounties did chauffeur Mulroney to the hotel at Mirabel Airport where he picked up the first batch of thousand dollar bills."
We still had to fork over $2.1-mil.

Kady is live-blogging the Oliphant Inquiry.

With apologies to Lewis Carroll from Creekside

Mulroney Schreiber Inquiry. Led by a Mulroney appointee.

I suppose when asked Stephen Harper's response will be that he "missed" that part. From the Office of the Prime Minister:

JUSTICE JEFFREY JAMES OLIPHANT Justice Oliphant was appointed on August 22, 1985 as a Justice of the Court of Queen's Bench of Manitoba. On December 24, 1990 he was appointed as Associate Chief Justice of the Court of Queen's Bench of Manitoba. He was appointed a Deputy Judge of the Nunavut Court of Justice in October 2002 and is a former Chair of the Judicial Inquiry Board of Manitoba. Justice Oliphant was born February 10, 1944. He graduated from the Faculty of Law from the University of Manitoba in May 1967 and was called to the bar on June 2, 1967. He worked for the law firm of Johnston & Company in Dauphin, Manitoba from 1967 – 1985.

On the surface all this looks pretty good. Justice Oliphant looks to be well qualified to inquire into the dealings of Brian Mulroney and Karlheinz Schreiber.

And then along comes Kady. She compared the dates of Justice Oliphant's appointments to the Court of Queen's Bench of Manitoba, (first as a Justice and later as Associate Chief Justice) and notices this: (emphasis mine)

Oliphant was appointed a Justice of the Court of Queen’s Bench of Manitoba, and later, Associate Chief Justice, by then-Prime Minister Brian Mulroney

Peachy! Is there a picture of them together? (No. I'm not asking a rhetorical question.) Perhaps Justice Oliphant could open the inquiry with, "Nice bells, Brian."

Really. This is the stuff of books.

Thanks Kady.