Oregon's new phallic symbols

Via WKW, some of the residents of the City of Keizer, Oregon seem to have a problem with concrete barriers designed to enhance pedestrian safety.

The City of Keizer is taking heat for installing a group of cement posts designed to protect pedestrians from cars, but which some say is a phallic symbol.

A total of 52 of the posts were installed at a busy intersection in Keizer and they are getting a lot of second glances.

A number of residents have complained to the city that the posts resemble male genitalia.

OK. They were erected to separate traffic from pedestrians at busy intersections. Honestly, I've seen these things all over the place. As the city manager says, they're a standard design.

Given the fact that a bunch of people obsessed with human genitalia and phallic symbols are objecting to these things, the proposed fix may actually cause more problems.

The city is looking into retrofitting the posts with metal collars and chains that run between them, which they hope will change the look. If not, they said the posts will have to go.

That will change the look alright, but I suspect the next thing the City of Keizer will discover is that a lot of residents know all about bondage and S&M. Metal collars? Chains? Ohhhh... the possibilities are endless. The city manager added this:

"If that fix doesn't work and I still think they look inappropriate, we'll have wasted $20,000 and we'll have to do something different."

I wonder, do any of these ridiculous prudes realize that these kinds of concrete pillars have been around for decades? And this from the country that produces over half the world's explicit pornography.

Just in case the residents of Keizer decide to leave their little world, I wouldn't recommend a major seaport. The bollards on the piers will give them a bad case of the vapours.